BEES!

Someone has mentioned to me "its more important to just *put out content*, then worry about half-written blog posts." That seems unwholesome and unsatisfying to me, but, also, I haven't posted in an month or more. So, because of that, you folk get to deal with copy/paste from a document I've labelled simply "Bees." See if you can guess why.

Why bees? I like bees. They give me a substance I turn into booze.

Creatures

Bee Golem

Not actually a golem, per se, but it sounds cooler than "humanoid bee swarm." Well, now that I've repeated it several times, maybe not. Either way, when the hive is threatened the bees (save for the Queen and her retinue, as well as the workers not present) swarm out, taking the vague shape of a large humanoid filling a 10'x10' space with appropriate reach. While it appears fairly solid, due to the massive number of bees involved, any attack against it using traditional weaponry (swords, arrows) pass right through it.

Number wise, we're talking about 10,000 bees per "golem", meaning a healthy hive can host 2 to 6 of these things. Though, if during the day, most of the workers will be out working, so just one forming is reasonable. And probably better for players.

While it is immune to normal weapons, area effects auto hit and do 5,000 damage as that number of bees decide the current course of action might night be the best.  Significant smoke effects will disperse the golem within 1d4+2 rounds, as the alarm pheromones become masked causing the bees to think everything is safe.

The bee golem can attack in several fashions, none of them pleasant. First, a range attack where a group of bees are launched at a target, swarming and attacking as breath weapon. Second, a slam attack where the fists of the humanoid cloud smashes into the target, however, this attack also does the same amount of damage to the golem, as the bees squish themselves and fall away. Finally, and most horribly, the bees have an 'engulf' attack, where the swarm gets automatic hits against whom ever shares the squares with them. All attacks are for 1d6.

The bee golem fears no critical hit, nor can it perform one. However, there is a 1 in 100 chance that a character is allergic to bees and will suffer a poison condition when stung. Alright, yes, it is technically 6 million to 1, but that's even more useless.

Bee Hounds

Dogs with bees in their mouth. When they bark they shoot bees at you.

Stats: As Dog, but with 1d6 Mouth Bee attack

Items

Bee Helmet

It is a helmet. Full of bees. Provides normal armor bonus and also protects against all Mind altering effects. This is due to the bees constantly stinging you, distracting you from the effects. Anything that needs concentration to sustain also automatically fails.

Charm Person? Not on this guy!

Bee in a vial
Ever wonder what happens when a colony feeds on spilled health potion instead of a sugar source? Ofcourse not. Either way, short answer: Healing bees. Keep one in a vial, shake the vial to anger it, apply to skin. When it stings you, treat as the smallest healing spell you got. Why this? I don't know. Why anything?

Slumgum Candle
A black candle made from the residue of beeswax rendering leftovers. When lit, it burns readily and makes an excellent fire starter. Treat as a standard candle, but one quality grade higher than normal.

Dream Mead
Originally fermented by an adventuring guild looking to make coin the city wouldn't tax (long story), Dream Mead uses the honey harvested from dire bees. While the honey is known to send the eater into a dream filled sleep, the mead sends the drinker into an alcohol fueled vision. The player may ask question composed of a number of words based on the number of drinks consumed; at a rate of two words per drink (8 drinks per bottle; drunk rules are doubled if used, -4 to stats until sober otherwise). Answers then play out before the drinker in response. Multiple drinkers do not get to share word count, but do see the same vision.

Beefolk Armor
If'n you've encountered the Beefolk of the Forgotten Lands ("How is it forgotten? It's on the map!" Shut. Up.) then your Murder Hobos have probably killed one and had the idea to hollow one out and wear their carapace as armor. Luckily, given the size, they can. The exoskeleton provides a Chain mail's rating of armor, and the wearer detects as "bee" or "insect", whichever is more usable. Also, "female" if they killed a worker, "male" if they killed a drone. The Queen, in her Majesty, is not suitable for armor making.


Spells

Summon Bee Golem
Cast via whispering promises of sugar into a lit Slumgum Candle, followed by a complicated dance involving plenty of butt wiggling and blowing out the candle. If outside, the golem arrives within 1d4 rounds. If inside, 1d6 minutes as they attempt to find a route inside. Using the slumgum candle in this manner reduces the quality rank by one.

Bee Eye
This spell requires two bees, who's eggs were laid in the same single hive cell and managed to reach adulthood (not even a remotely natural happening). These malformed bees must be taken from the hive and placed into a jar at the same time. The spell itself is cast via shaking the jar vigorously and shouting the incant, then opening the jar and shoving the opening to your eye. As the first bee inevitably stings the caster, it shrivels to a husk and collapses, leaving the stinger in the caster's eye. The other bee swells with life and vigor it should have had. The caster, in the eye he was stung, is now able to see through the surviving bee and direct its movements. The spell lasts as long as the stinger remains in the caster's eye.

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