[HMtW] Hilbert Whales and the Tools Used to Harvest Them

Hilbert Whales

Beast Dungeon Lord

Descending from higher Euclidean n-spaces to feed, the Hilbert Whale is a native to the Flesh realm, just a different geometric part of it. Long ago gams* of Hilbert Whales were seen traveling the astral space on a regular basis, but once Wizards learned of the powerful astrogris and stochastaceti all up in their guts, the numbers dwindled from constant harvesting without time allowed for the numbers to repopulate.

Attributes: Swords 8 | Pentacles 0 | Cups 2 | Wands 2

Likes: 8D Krill, the echoing songs off of Minerva Cascade

Hates: Harpoons, Lances, Whalers

Special Rules

• The Whale itself is a big ass creature, consisting of several zones unto itself, each an antagonist: Head, Tail, Body, Left Tentacle Node, Right Tentacle Node.

• Each zone has lesser and greater dooms associated with it. If a particular  zone is disabled, entangled, or defeated, it can no longer use those abilities. 

• Despite having separate pools of HD for each section, Whales have only a single Initiative.

Head

Health/Defense: 4/6

Frontal part with all the thinking bits, hard cranial shell for ramming, and big bitey bites for chomping. If this part is defeated, it is Blind.

Lesser Dooms

• Bite: Usually a filter feeder, it’ll still bite the shit out of you. Doing a big chomp, it makes an Attack and Roots the target on a success, until it opens its mouth again. 

Greater Dooms

• Bile Attack: Feeding on linear causality, it can regurgitate its recent meal as chaos. Forces everyone within a zone to draw from a random maleficence table.

• Swallow: Any foes currently being Bit may be Swallowed. The victim is held in an extra dimensional space composed of higher geometries, until they fall into the whale's stomach. Killing the whale causes it to automatically barf up all swallowed creatures.

• Victims can use the Test Fate actions to test Swords while swallowed. 
• If they succeed 3 times, they make the whale vomit them up. 
• If they fail 3 times, they fall into the whale's stomach and are annihilated. 
• Greater outcomes count as 2 outcomes for free/annihilated purposes.
• Smart ideas may cause the whale to barf up all swallowed creatures.

Left/Right tentacle clusters

Health/Defense: 5/0 (each)

Typically used for feeding, they can also be used for limited defense. Once defeated, these limbs become useless.

Lesser Dooms

• Grab: Roughhouse to attempt to grab a foe. While grabbed, an adventurer is Rooted. 

• While grabbed, a foe can be Squeezed, Thrown, or moved to the mouth for Biting. 

Greater Dooms

• Sweep: A tentacle lashes out, sweeping across the zone. Performs an Attack against everyone in the Zone. 

• Squeeze: Play a greater doom to squeeze all grabbed foes, automatically dealing them a Wound. 

Body

Thick fur covers the body making it extremely hard to injure, but also climbable. If you’re into that. The flippers are located here and, if defeated, it will be unable to steer itself.  

Health/Defense: 6/6

Notes

• Tough. Actions targeting this section must exceed its Initiative. 

Greater Doom

• Ram: With a mighty thrust of its flippers, the whale rushes forward crashing through with its mighty cranial shell. Both Attacks and Roughhouses whatever it crashes into. 

Tail

A bifurcated, Y-finned…uh, tail. Also its primary form of locomotion. Defeating this section causes the beast to be unable to Dash.

Health/Defense: 7/0

Greater Doom

• Thrash: Through a broad sweep, the tail attacks every target in the zone.

Yeah, the front part is more active than the back.

Harvestables

You're not out here butchering these beautiful creatures for nothing. Besides pay. Once you harvest the whale, though, its technically company property, so these reagents will have to be purchased.

Potions: Using the astrogris within the intestines you're able to make a Love potion, which effectively drags anyone experiencing the wearer two positions towards "Admiration" on the Disposition star. 

Bomb: Using the stochastaceti from inside the skull, you make a bomb which forces the target to draw against a random maleficence table as stochastic energies crackle around the area. 

Oil: The blubber of the beast creates one helluva oil. Lanterns burning this whale oil gain an extra flicker, but forever reek of a fishy smell. 

Oil: The astrogris may also be rendered into a frictionless oil that is used to power many magical machines.

Food: Preparing the dark, tender, red meat is possible in multiple ways: steak, sashimi, salt-cured, dried (jerky), or in hot pot dishes. Consuming it, however, swarms with consumer with visions of multiple possible futures, leaving them Stressed. Much like mince pies of the mid-1800's though, the nightmare experience is part of the appeal. 

Wearables**: Whale hide and fur may be made into light armor with 1 extra Notch. 

Tools of the Trade

Harpoon

Harpoons are technically spears: Wooden shaft, metal tip, made for jamming into soft meat bits. Whaling harpoons were much heavier than the war spears, intended not to be thrown and retrieved, but only thrusted into a whale long enough to deliver the barbed iron tip, tied to ropes leading back to the whaling boat. This tied off bard was then used to tire out the whale and keep it in place while it was getting killed by the lance. Technically, it should be a petty officer doing the harpooning, but this is a game, make the players do it. 

Mechanically, the harpoon does 1 damage, as standard. When a harpoon is struck, the thrower is Rooted to the larger creature. If the combined Swords of all harpoon-wielders is greater than the total Health of the larger creature, the creature is Rooted instead. Requires two hands.

Lance

Lances are what did the gruesome killing on a whale. Vicious blades jammed into the vital organs of the tired out whale and jambled around until everything keeping the whale alive stopped working. Technically, this should be a mate or the captain, but this is a game, make the players do it. 

Mechanically, the Whaling Lance does Critical damage to Rooted targets. Requires two hands. 

____________________
* Hold up, hold up, hold up. A pod of whales can also be called a "gam," right? Well, habitual readers will note from the last entry that whalers called their social gatherings "gammings." They named their social gatherings after whale pods. Those dork ass losers. No wonder no one liked them. 

** I could have sworn someone wrote a subsystem for armor crafting in one of the gamejams. Damned if I can find it now, though.

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[HMtW] Encounters Upon the Astral Sea

Whaling Upon an Astral Sea

Some dang fool blorbed an astral whaling ship into their prep, but never reckoned the players would set foot on the Most Interesting Thing. 

The entries are written assuming the Players have taken on as Greenhands (180th lay), unless the character's have relevant failed Careers: Blacksmith (20th lay), Carpenter (120th lay), Cook (120th lay), Cooper (30th lay). If that is the case, then the characters may hire on as an Idle and receive higher pay.  

It's also assumed the environment is more of a Treasure Planet style Etherium, awash in neon magenta and vibrant purples, along with all the oxygen you could ever want to huff down, rather than the cold, cruel void of realistic space.

The Meatgrinder

01. Lanterns Gutter

02. Lanterns Gutter

03. Lanterns Gutter

04. Lanterns Gutter

05. Lanterns Gutter

06. [Curiosity] The deck of the ship begins to become encrusted in salty rime.

07. [Curiosity] The Oldhands, as one, begin to sing a grim sea shanty of lost shores and forgotten loves. 

08. [Curiosity] A lonely dyson sphere has come unmoored and drifts lost and forgotten. 

09. [Curiosity] Out, just on the edge of vision, something red and blinking follows the ship for a watch, before turning off and returning to the eternal night. 

10. [Curiosity] If you strain your ears, you swear you can hear a thin, monotonous whine of accursed flutes drifting upon the solar winds.

11. [Travel Event] A nearby star has gone super nova. The initial gravitational wave has knocked out the helmsman, with other crew, and the coronal mass is rapidly growing closer. If the card is [upright] the former star forms a diffuse nebula, or [reverse] it collapses into a black hole. Which brings it's own set of problems.

12. [Travel Event] The ship passes within view of a galactic void, long thought haunted, and the Oldhands of the crew make a sign of warding. Anyone who doesn't is Stressed by an odd foreboding sense. 

13. [Travel Event] An Oldhand, scarred and grizzled, challenges a character to a wager of Five Finger Fillet. Two options here: test of Pentacles to avoid stabbing yourself, OR letting the player test their skill in the real world (their choice, obviously, and preferably with something safe, but I ain't your momma.) If successful, coin! If unsuccessful, the character takes a Wound as they stab their own hand.

14. [Travel Event] Just off to port, coming from the passing asteroid field, drifts the song of space sirens. Gods, it's enchanting! More and more of the crew are beginning to agree and REALLY want to get over there for a better listen.

15. [Travel Event] Chronowaves wash over the ship, revealing the ghost of a lost Cosmonaut. It largely stands there and screams, head aflame, unable to fully interact with the world around it. The distracting scream causes Disadvantage on tests of Fate aboard the ship until it's dealt with.

16. [Random Encounter] Many cultures interact with the astral space differently. One has sent out an arcane Von Neumann probe, which has attached to the ship and created [characters+1] aggressive copies of itself before setting off again. 

17. [Random Encounter] With colors nailed, a pirate ship sets its eyes on the player's ship. The symbols upon their flag make it clear: there's to be no quarter offered or accepted.

18. [Random Encounter] A comet of burning green ice shoots overhead, dumping [characters] worth of Astro-zombies onto the deck of the ship. 

19. [Random Encounter] A tear in reality reveals a Hilbert Whale returning to Real Space, diving down from a higher dimension to feed. These things are swollen with astrogris and stochastaceti; and are the reason you're out here. 

20. [Random Encounter] From nova's heart I stab at thee! The captain has spotted the white Hilbert Whale and craves their revenge. All current quests and agreements are forgotten, all that matters to the captain is revenge. The captain's commands from here on out should be reckless and endanger everyone.

21. [Quest Rumor] A ship in distress, lulls in the distance to starboard. Convincing the Captain to give aid and succor to the ship allows the adventures to meet a traveling sage who surprisingly knows about the McGuffin the characters are after. 

One day I'll get the patience to put that in a table to make it easier to read. Not today.

New Camp Action: Tattooing

Without devolving into another anti-capitalist rant (which I did half type out), I'll simply state that my brief research suggested that American whaling companies did not often keep maritime tradition, including that of line-crossing and tattooing. But, fuck 'em, this is a game about magically sailing a boat through space to hunt space whales. You're getting tattoos.  

Until I've time to make them into a whole _thing_, they are Advantage in social situations among people who would be impressed by such things (sailors, former sailors, youth dreaming of adventure, etc). 

Getting Paid

Whalers were paid in lays, rather than a wage. These were basically fractions of the profit from the overall voyage, which would return with $35-50K worth of oil. This meant, should a Greenhand not desert over the 2-4 years at sea, they would end the journey with a cool $200 lining their pocket. Assuming they didn't take on any debts with the company, that is. They most likely did.

Game wise, you can just reward the players with 100 gold per whale harvested. OR consult the list if you want to bring in their skills and importance to the ship: 

Greenhand: 100 gold

Blacksmith: 900 gold

Carpenter: 150 gold

Cook: 150 gold

Cooper: 600 gold

If you've got some made up profession important to your "totally serious and need for complete accuracy space whale hunting game" the pay rate equation is ((36000/lay)/2) in gold per whale harvested. 

Gamming

I seem to just be adding in random bits at this point. 

Whalers weren't really liked in maritime social circles. Merchants and Navy folk often saw them as unfit sailors with subpar ships. This was basically true given the company owners cut costs at every turn, would hire anyone, and instructed the captains to encourage desertion on the return trip, so the owners wouldn't have to pay the sailors. Again, turning away from the rant, this didn't exactly breed competency. This in turn caused other sailors not to like being around whalers. So, they had to stick to themselves. 

Gamming was a form of socializing at sea among whaling vessels. Basically when two ships met, they would come together, man and officers mingling ships, to trade gossip and information. Newspapers and gifts were often exchanged. Dances were common. 

Mechanically, what this means, is if another whaling ship is encountered, a modified City action can be taken by the party. If you're gonna go into a whole whaling side adventure.

References

Most of what I learned about whaling came from here. Surprisingly interesting. I have learned too much about whaling to ever be happy again. 

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Every Table has that one friend who wants to play, and we want them to play, but their awful schedule makes committing to anything nearly impossible. I'm currently that friend and because of that I've been fascinated with the idea of a class based around not always being able to make it. Something that can keep up with the other classes, even if it's been a while. Technically, yes, that's all of them, but new features are fun to get and the lethality of the system can make it hard get anyway after too many missed sessions.

Originally the idea centered around abilities powered by how many sessions you've missed. I'm still taken with the idea, but after some late night sci-fi, I went in a different direction. One where your "not knowing the plot" or "not having a clue about the current situation" is a feature. 

It's geared towards usage in Some Weird Sin, but there shouldn't be any actual hindrance in using it in another GLoG rule set or setting. It might get a little Mary Sue-ish, but c'mon, your friend can't make it often, and also there's the high lethality again.

The Leaper

Not a Batroc sort of leaper, mind you. More the Sam Beckett sort. Or Ben Song. (It was a decent follow up series and you fucking know it. Other than their pure cowardice at not continuing the outrageous future fashion trends.) 

You're someone from the future who has, for some reason or another, chosen to travel back in time, only to find out you have no actual control of where and when you're going. Also, instead of traveling through space, you seem to be traveling through aura - that is replacing the physicality of a person with your own, while wearing their aura and thus looking like them. That might sound weird, or unscientific, but you were foolish enough to step into an untested time travel machine. So, glass houses.

There's only one level to the Template as it's intended to grow in breath rather than depth. Delta templates still affect you, however.

Starting Gear: None

A. Quantum Replacement, Upgrade Points, Holographic Companion, Holographic Interface, Super Computer

Quantum Replacement

You jump into the initial scene of the current game session, physically replacing an NPC, but keeping their aura attached to you. Mechanically, this means you look like them, but carry your own stats with you from session to session. While you exist in their place, the NPC is in the future with your aura, kept sedated in a medical bay. Should you die while replacing them, they are forever trapped in the future. 

Additionally, this also means you don't have starting gear, or any gear, other than what the NPC had on them. 

Upgrade Points

You don't have the standard XP progress everyone else has. Instead, your Conviction is replaced with a goal related to the person you've replaced, often revealed by the Companion a moment or two after getting your bearings. Completing this goal nets you an Upgrade Point, which is spent on 'purchasing' Features of the Super Computer, which in turn adjust your abilities. Explain it however you feel most comfortable. Use the word "quantum" a lot.

Holographic Companion 

You've a Holographic Companion that only you can see and hear. Transmitted from the future through quantum signaling brainwave transmission bullshit, they're also able to see and hear your general surroundings, but not physically interact with them, or you. (Though sometimes they can sit or lean on unattended surfaces? It's not very clear). They serve as your connection between the present and the future, able to communicate with the rest of the support staff. Note, though, that while they are genuinely concerned for your safety, they have their own life they also have to attend to and may not be experiencing time in the same order or rate as you.

Holographic Interface 

In the future there exists a Holographic Imaging Chamber which allows your Companion to communicate with you, and see what you see. Through a series of technobabble that you didn't pay attention to, the Imaging Chamber is able to adjust your visual and audio experience based on the assorted abilities of the Super Computer. I'm going to call this an Overlay Attempt and doing so requires a 1d6 roll on your part, dealing 1 point of Fatigue damage on a 3+.

Super Computer 

The project operates on such a scale of unfathomable probabilities that normal computers, even future computers, aren't able to handle the calculation load. Luckily, there exists a multi-story, multi-room super computer covered in aesthetic lighting and containing more qubits than grains of sand on a beach. Also, maybe your DNA for some reason? It needs its own fusion reactor to meet it's computation needs. 

Features

Language Databases

Every point in this feature gains you access to an additional Language. Your Companion will slowly interpret or translate for you, potentially making things awkward. An Overlay Attempt is needed in order to speak said language.

Location Lookup

Every point in this feature improves the Super Computer's chances (x-in-6) of being able to locate a particular person at the current moment. Cycling through related camera feeds from the past takes a few moments, though, so be patient. An Overlay Attempt generates a visual trail to their location, allowing them to be followed if on the move.

Password Database

For each point placed in this feature, there's an X-in-6 chance the Super Computer can estimate the password for a given system. 

Signal Detection

Through better aligning with your biological neural network residual frequency and...uh...aura, the Super Computer is able to detect potential radio signals to decode and playback, given an Overlay Attempt. 

Skill Databases

Every point placed in this feature gains you access to an additional Skill. Well, not you, but the Super Computer. But, you can ask questions of it as you would normal Skill you had OR with an Overlay Attempt, you can physically use the skill as if you knew it yourself by following the training dummy only you can see.

Visual Augment

For each point put in this feature, the Super Computer is able to analyze an additional light frequency and display it over your vision with an Overlay Attempt. Frequencies include: Magnetic, infrared, x-ray, ultraviolet, radiation, light-to-dark, and dark-to-light. Only one may be accessed at a time and each change requires a new roll.

Additionals

Evil Leaper

Evil assholes from your future's future, trying to stop you from doing something you'll probably do in the future. Real jackasses. Because both of you exist within the holographic quantum display interface relay thing, you're able to see past the aura they wear to their real self underneath. I'm saying that you'll be able to actually be able to see them, and them you, rather than each seeing the person replaced. So you'll know 'em when you see 'em.

The Final Leap.

Finally got a decent schedule you can commit to and looking to get back to a normal template? Go on, then, cash out and send your Leaper on one final leap (they never make it home). Afterwards, take the number of Update Points you have, multiply them by 100, then us that much in Cred when making a new character.

<sidebar>

It just occurred to me that all this time I've assumed "Dr. Sam Beckett never returned home" meant he was still out there, continuing to leap and help people. It could just as easily be that, without Al's help, he screwed up the very next leap on his own and is dead, somewhere back there in the past. Like all those forgotten Cosmonauts.

</sidebar>

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Kingdomites: Brutal Frontier (A Review)

I never had television as a kid. Utility companies really hate running out to the ass end of Nowhere for a handful of people too stupid to leave a dying town and the aerial never picked up too well from any of the major stations half a state away. Given them circumstances, I never really got to see cartoons.

So when the OSR community goes on about their "Pirates of Dark Water" or their "Ducktales," I can only nod and pretend to fit in. I know of these things, osmosised from popular culture somehow, but the absolute specifics that friends of mine seem to run on are a mystery to me.

I'm just a Nexus-6 staring at shared memes, wondering who the hell these people were and trying to make connections. 

That being said, as soon as I started flipping through the physical copy I had made of "Kingdomites Brutal Frontier", one of the many games made by Hodag, my head snapped back like a Democrat president riding through Dallas. Neurons blazing connectivity in the nicotine soaked meat imprisoned in my fracture lined skull. Autogenic memories boiling to the forefront of Knowing. I was suddenly aware of what an Eternia was. What the hell a Battle Cat was and it's differences to a Snarf. The unfettered joy of crass commercialism and making shit up purely to sell toys. 

I sat and flipped through the physical prints: Three A4 sized booklets (The Player Guide and Character Maker; Villains and Vehicles; and the Balloids bonus zine) across 5 sheets of paper, double sided. Immediately what stuck out was the fact that these things were undeniably Hodag and completely DIY. Sure, these days it's easy enough to acquire publishing software and pump out something that looks good, but sterile. All smooth lines and clear, uniform text; readable and usable, but boring.

This? This is pure human made.  

Sections of the book are blocked off with a thick marker that wabbeled as Hodag's hand moved across the page. There's not a straight line in this. Marker ink blots in one place from a pause that lasted a moment too long. Hand written text that, with enough patience and careful copying, one can use to produce a letter that'll get Hodag in very big trouble with the local FBI office. Hell, you can even see where there was a piece of dust stuck on the scanner he was using. In these modern days flooded with AI slop, Hodag remains unapologetically human.

The pure, unadulterated DIY of this drug my mind back to the handmade concoctions that were the punk zines of the later 20th century. Hand made out of passion, scoffing at conformity, and dripping with attitude. Thems the sort I would find laying around the flophouse I lived in. Back when I was a feral teen clad in a leather jacket and fueled by horny anger. Scavenging cans for the deposit, just to afford a ticket to a show. My largest expenses being 40s and packs of cigarettes. Before this sorry state I've become. A sad, overweight, divorced, fifty year old man clad in depression and fueled by white monster energy drinks. I drive a minivan and own a sweater vest for god's sake.

I lit the remains of a dogged cigarette - I needed something to slow this train of thought down, countersteam this bastard before it threw me off the rails, sending me careening headlong into the shadowy gorge of forgotten memories. I sat with the lingering self doubts and regrets. Reassured myself that while I own the sweater vest, I cannot firmly verify its whereabouts. 

I just...Fuck. Alright. I get the cartoon nostalgia thing now. Better days, better days. 

The system itself is straight forward 2d6 "meet or beat" using a points array for the six attributes: Might, Magic, Mechanical, Marksmanship, Mobiles, Motivation. These are for exactly what they sound like (with the last two being for vehicle and emotional actions respectfully). Then there's your Play Points, which cover both your health and magic resources. Combat is simultaneous, with everyone acting at once and relying on the game master to interoperate rolls and make judgements based on the game flow and logic at the current situation. 

I can see the logic behind the Play Points lumping in health and magics together, I just ain't entirely sure how I feel about 'em. The points can be reduced by 1d6 via weapon damage, harmful magic, and are easily restored by 1d6 via healing magic. Technically this makes the attempt to heal "free," as you spend 1 Play Point to cast heal for 1d6 Play Point restoration, as long as you're playing a magic character; which you just can. If you want. Sure, why not. 

Honestly, a lot of this system relies on a "sure, why not" attitude of relying on the game master. Can your character do magic? "Sure, why not." Can I bring a character back next time after they've already been defeated? "Sure, why not." Can my fur wearing barbarian fly around on a photon powered hoverboard? "Sure, why not." Typically, something like this doesn't work terribly well - take the travesty that is the later books of the Dark Tower for instance. 

Wait, hold on. The system and setting are couched around the idea of action figures at play, with no character actually dying, just removed from play for a little bit. "Returning next episode." Alright, I talked myself into it. The Play Points work, you just gotta stop taking everything so seriously. Sure, why not.

Also, as I'm writing this I have the He-Man cartoon playing in the background. The Champion of Castle Greyskull has just invaded Hell with a mechanical elephant man and a laser cowboy. Also heaven was killed? So, sure, why the hell not.

Additionally, there's mention of "how to roll D66" that never really pays off anywhere. A little digging shows this to be a hold over from the "Kingdomites! Of Teknoskull Island" game that Brutal Frontier is based on. Just not really related to the current version. An odd, nominal mention, really. 

Over all a firm 4 out of 5, with points off purely for Hodag's preference of Pepsi over Coke. 

To get Kingdomites: Brutal Frontier, simply email Hodag at (Hodagmag at Gmail dot com) with the subject line "GET BRUTAL". Additionally, more of Hodag's prolific library of work can be found at his blog, No Foes, No Traps, and his Itch.io page.

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Appendix N

It's another bandwagon day, and here's another bandwagon entry. This time around, it's an Appendix N. This one ain't gonna be exhaustive, because, well, I forgot about the assignment until zero hour. 

Now, working in both cyberpunk and the occasional fantasy, I should probably make two separate lists to keep things more sorted, but: No. 

Wayspell's Appendix N

Authors 

Gibson, William

It's a coincidence he's at the top of the list, but he certainly should be. His fingerprints are in just about everything cyberpunk related and my slop ain't no exception. And do you know how hard it is to steal things from cyberpunk stories when both Cyberpunk (RPG) and Shadowrun have already ransacked the place? Extremely.

Giraud, Jean 

Better known as Moebius, his work in comics is what got me developing a secret love for French science fiction - though I'll admit I'm woefully under-exposed to it. There's something about his surrealist stylings that feel both comfortable and mystical to me. I ain't educated enough to pin down the style (Ligne claire? That ain't it. Bande dessinee, maybe.) but the vibe is passed on in "Fifth Element" and "Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets." I've tried reproducing the style in my own drawings, but never seem to get the hang of it. 

Lovecraft, H.P.

A nerd read H.P. Lovecraft and now likes putting eldritch horrors in things? I'm shocked! SHOCKED I SAY! Well, maybe not that shocked. 

Prachett, Terry

I have a bad habit of carrying real life bs into playing pretend and getting things grim dark. That ain't exactly fun for me. But reading a bit of Prachett also evens my mood out and reminds me there can be some whimsy, even in the big serious times. 

Rucker, Rudy

Rouge AIs are good and all, but what if you made 'em psychopathic weirdos? Some one's probably going to try and bang them, unfortunately. But! Until then! Weirdo AIs.  

Thompson, Hunter S. 

Coming of age in a Conservative community between the times Bush was slamming planes into buildings (for making fake excuses to go to war with the family enemy) and when Bush was abandoning the city of New Orleans, was not an easy time for someone who can put two and two together. Finding Thompson's works, sadly near the end of his days before Bush had him assassinated, showed me the oligarch bastards have been pulling this depravity for sometime, and that, no, the conservative community was not Normal or Healthy but in need of being treated or put down. Also, a few have claimed his writing style has rubbed off on me. I reckon been kicked in the head by a mule. 

Wellman, Manly Wade 

What if Lovecraft, but less racist? And more hopeful? Silver John, that's what. Also, as I'm writing this, I'm starting to realize Manly Wellman may be the reason my fantasy worlds look more like the New World than whatever the hell medieval Europe looks like. 

Books

Dune (Frank Herbert) 

Deep time has always fascinated me, both towards the past and the future. While not the deepest out there (only 20K) there's still plenty of time for things to get weird. Also, the importantness of drugs and the boundless light of Allah. 

Hellboy (Mike Mignola)

You're mixing science AND magic? While throwing in old myths? How am I not going to aggressively borrow from this?

Hyperion  (Dan Simmons)

Sometimes you just need a spaceship that's a tree, powered by a black hole and crewed by clones, so that you can go on your Canterbury Tales rip off. 

Lord of the Rings (JRR Tolkien)

Sure, it's influential, but not in a good way. The story was fine (ignoring the crypto-fascism and pro-monarchy slant), but there was just so much needless nonsense bullshit stacked in the way. Not every tree needs a 10 page backstory. Sometimes a song is just a song. Cut out the fat and move on. This is a point of dissonance as, as a cyberpunk writer, I'm compelled to word vomit facts of a made up world into a gazette, as if anyone actually running a game has interest in that.  

Poetic Edda (as translated by Jackson Crawford)

Read and reread this to snag elements for a Viking themed larp I was helping run way back in the days of my back still working. I'll still drop Norse inspired elements into my games, be it ghosts using secrets as health or dragons being a result of sin.  

Snow Crash (Neal Stephenson) 

I've surely read other works by him, but my tired brain is not providing those answers at the moment. But, civil authority replaced by corporate city-states populated by an apathetic, ignorant populous while said corporations loot and plunder ancient artifacts is right up my alley. 

Movies and TV

Back to the Future (1985)

Don't shy away from time travel in your games, you cowards. 

Fifth Element (1997)

As mentioned above, the aesthetics of this movie are amazing. I really do need to run more weirdo science fiction games.

Ghost in the Shell (1995)

Absolutely nothing like the manga, from what I recall. I'm sure the movie was chock full of philosophical ponderings about what what it means to be human in the day and age of cybernetic augments and complete body replacements, but the most important take away was clearly the spider tanks. Spider. Tanks.  

Hackers (1995) 

I'm pretty sure I filed the serial numbers off most things in this movie for the Console Jockeys. This and that one episode of Ghost Writer.  

Labyrinth (1986) 

Make. Goblins. Weird. Again.

Mad Max 1-4; Furiousa (1979, 1981, 1985, 2015; 2024)

Every generic teenage boy with no personality seems to have fetish for a "post-apocalypse" setting and story. I was no different. Even did a report on it. What I took away from it, besides the ultimate futility of man, is that major bad guy NPCs need to be over the top and violence needs to have a point to it.

Robocop (1987)

Oh boy, was I ever far too young when I first saw this. Later rewatchings, however, got the philosophic messages across, from the comments on personal identity to the statement of fact that is "Corporations are bastards."

Star Wars (1977)

I'm sure this was a surprise to no one. It's your basic, good old Hero's Journey with space wizard knights turned outcast adventurers in a world full of weirdos AND deep time? Put it in my veins.  

The Watch (2021)

Look, as a Discworld adaption, it was bad to the point of "adaption" being the wrong word. I do think, however, you take out the Discworld character names and the baggage that comes with them, and you've got something serviceable there. Either way, the _aesthetic_ is what I really like, and try to sneak it into any fantasy thing I'm running. 

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (2017)

So very French. So full of weirdos. And it's okay to have weirdos in your world. Perhaps better if so. So very pretty. ...Do I just like pretty looking space operas?  

  

Again, not the complete list, but a bit that comes to mind at 11:30 the night before it's due. The take away from this little moment of self reflection is that I need to run more fantasy again. I don't know what happened. I use to love it. I blame the larp. It's the source of my knee pain and liver cirrhosis, after all. 

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the Skull Hawker

The call starts simple enough, piercing the eternal silence of the Dungeon: 

"HEY"

Echoing so close, it can easily be mistaken for something someone in the party said. A sudden outburst in a place like this is not unheard of, and no shame to all but the most hardened adventurer. There would be no judgement.

"HEY? HEY!" 

This time slightly further away. Or perhaps behind. Certainty, now, that it is not one of the party. Yet, no other light source burns in the immediate area. What poor soul could be trapped down here with no light source? Soon the answer becomes all too obvious.

"YOU WANNA BUY A SKULL?"

the Skull Hawker

     [Travel Event] 

S 0 | P 0 | C 0 | W 1
H/D 1/0
Likes: Skulls, Haggling
Hates: Bright light, Slime

Scuttling from the darkness and every tight space in the general area, 10 + [discard value] leathery cephalopods, knee high to the average human and wearing skulls for shells, swarm the player characters, babbling away as they do so. 

"BUY? SKULL? YOU BUY!"

These creatures wish no ill will to the PCs, the opposite actually. They wish to provide the adventurers with the highest quality skulls possible. For a price of course. 

Barking and babbling, they'll call out various prices while showing off the various skulls they carry with them, just in case of a sale. Trouble is, they neither understand currency nor haggling. They sure as hell love it though. To the point they'll even begin swapping between themselves and the players, should the bastards get their fervor up. Should the players seem not interested in buying, the Hawkers will naturally see if they're interested in selling. 

"SKULLS HERE. GET YA SKULLS. ONLY ONE PREVIOUS OWNER! LIKE NEW!"

 Now, by themselves, they ain't much of a threat. They just want to buy and sell their skull collections. That's it. The problem comes with how damn loud they are, and the fact they refuse to take 'No' as an answer. Seemingly incapable of speaking quieter than a scream, they generate a huge racket, drawing the interest of any nearby dungeon horror. That, paired with encircling the players almost instantly, could spell trouble. 

"HEY BUDDY. I'LL GIVE YOU A GOLD FOR YOUR SKULL! YOU SELLING?"

Mechanically, this means that until the Skull Hawkers are convinced to go away, anything that would need peace and quiet, or extended concentration, automatically fails. Attempts at being stealthy are right out. When pulling from the Meatgrinder, pull twice, as both events happen at the same time. (Except for two instances of [Torches Gutter] being drawn at once. Just do it once.) 

"BUYING? BUY! SELL! 30 GOLD! YOU GIVE."

Now, why are they doing all this? It's sort of a cargo cult situation, really. Ever since their home, the Underworld, opened up to the surface, those damned surface dwellers have been coming down here to die. But why? The Hawkers are attempting to figure that out. Finding so many corpses of adventurers, the Hawkers' greatest minds examined them in detail, as they pulled on their beards and scratched their chins in deep thought. Eventually, a pattern was realized; there were almost always two things on the found bodies: coins and skulls. Surely these had to be related. Surely the surface dwellers valued these things. Why else would they bring them down here to be buried with? Thus, Hawker society suddenly formed a Merchant class, one that was immediately sent out to worship and barter with these Surfacers.

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[HMtW] Cybernetics for the Worm

 
Some time ago I had been working on a cyberpunk hack of His Majesty the Worm I had been calling "A COMPUTER CAN NEVER BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE" - named after the page from the 1979 IBM training manual. My main motivation for it was the chance at releasing the hack before the actual game itself. Had years to work on it. But, like most poor decisions in my life, I was talked out of it and grew bored of the joke. 

I figured I may as well share the augments for it. 

"Where are the prices?" 

Never got that far. 

Changes to the Base System 
     The intention was to cut out the middle man of charging the Bonds and holding onto the points until a Camping phase, where they become Resolve. Instead, "Charging a Bond" automatically restores a point of Resolve. The hope here is that role play is brought to the forefront and used to power the augments repeatedly. The augments were then changed to not use Resolve, but I still liked the removal of the extra step.

Installation
     Capitalism forces the Worker to sell their body far below its value, then simply replaces them when said body begins to fail. With the invention of the cybernetic augmentations, the Capitalist is now able to sell replacement parts for the broken Worker, keeping them further in debt and producing surplus value they’ll never take part in. 

At first, the cybernetics were simply a prosthetic medical device, replacing lost limbs with neural feedback capable robotic replicas. With each additional iteration, however, came further and further functionality. Then, one day, it happened. A line was crossed: Someone took the leap of replacing perfectly functional organic parts with the newest in cybernetic. 

From there, it was a short matter of time until certain augments were required to stay a prospect in the job market. Or even functional in your day-to-day. Due to this, everyone is assumed to have had a Vivo/Silico  Interface modulation device (VSI) installed in their head during childhood, which is the time the organic neural network is still plastic enough to adapt to the presence of the VSI implant. The VSI comes with one external data port and is easily upgradeable to account for interfaced augments. 

(Design note: The VSI implant is manufactured by and purchased from one of the four major corporations: SWORDS Weapons Technologies; PENTACLES Biomedical; CUPS Research Limited; WANDS International Industries. The chosen brand would relate to the character's Path. Nothing of importance to Note here, just showing you what a clever boy I am.) 

The Augments
More would be needed for an actual game, but these are what I had listed out. 

Biomonitor Beacon - Not really useful for you, but anyone attempting First Aid on you, while using AR, receives Favor on their attempt. Also allows your teammates to see, and take In Character, your current Status. Not that anyone was terribly worried about that anyway. 

Boltagon Modulator - There's modulating your voice, then there's weaponizing it. Specialize audio equipment lodged in your throat allows you to spend a Resolve and play a card to Roughhouse (Deafen) a target, or Notch a target object. By yelling at it. 

Brain Box - Your skull has been encased in a titanium webbed mesh, embedded with a micro life support system, and an explosive ejection system at the base of your neck. Upon reaching (and marking) Death's Door, the Brain Box explodes from your body, rocketing off to a presumed 'safe' location, and begins emitting a locator beacon. The system contains power for 24 hours of operation once activated. The Deluxe version is gold plated and includes psychoactive chemicals and a solitaire program, to entertain the user until recovery. 

Bright Eyes - Overcharged LEDs are hidden among the VSI status lights in your irises. By spending a Resolve and playing a card on your action, you may Roughhouse (Blind) a target who you’re currently Engaged with.

Drone Control Unit - Shares a single, specially connected drone's sensory data with the user. Commands to the drone still require CUPS, but it can be done so without a remote or physically speaking. An additional unit(s) allows for an additional drone(s) to be controlled. 

Embedded Weapon - Box off an inventory slot and add a single handed weapon to it. This weapon is now jammed inside your forearm and immune to Disarming. The weapon does not need a hand to be “carried,” but it does need a hand to be “used.”

Extra Arm - You gain an extra hand slot, +50% to armor costs for the customization, and weird looks from people you meet on the street. 

Hand Grenade - Why yes, I am going to continue to make this joke. In a moment of desperation, or boredom, you may detach the hand and use it as a grenade (attacking everyone in the zone). Obviously, it's consumed on use and you're out of a hand slot until replaced.

Internal Communication Device - Modern day version of the phone. Installed in your head with a translucent display under a pupil, and an indicator light in your iris, you've but to concentrate on a contact and the device will dial their number, allowing for communication without speech. Additional user interface is provided through tongue gestures. 

Internal Gyroscope - You've got yourself a gyroscope jammed in your chest cavity. What's it doing in there? Spinning. Constantly. Keeping you upright. Gain the motif "Internally Gyroscoped." 

Knowing Port - Allows the use of Knowledge Chips (one per port) and making Lore bids against the subject contained on them. Usually installed just behind an ear, next to the data port.

Overclocked Muscles - Your muscle meat has been spliced with gorilla DNA, soaked in growth hormones, and bound by carbon fiber reinforced tendons, allowing you to perform incredible feats of strength. Gain the motif "Overclocked Muscles" and +50% armor price, as it now has to be tailored to fit over your massive muscles.

Speech Encryption - By two (or more) players spending Resolve, the characters may now speak in what any outside observer interrupts only as babble. To each other though, the speech is completely understandable and, through quantum bullshit, completely secure. Activation lasts an entire scene, and characters may slip in and out of the encryption when speaking to/around people without the augment. 

Sub-dermal Armor - Block off an inventory slot and mark it “Armor.” This inventory slot may now be wounded as if it was armor. Because it is, and must be Repaired in the same manner, though checking all the notches doesn't destroy it like normal armor. 

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