Lair of the Wyrm


It's a tale as old as time: species rises out of the primordial goo, species becomes the predominant lifeform on the planet, species discovers the power of the atom, species destroys itself with said power of the atom, mutant survivors of the species discover unexploded bomb and begins to worship it as a god at direction of the bored, insane AI system originally created to manage the launch facility. 

Then, maybe, adventurers show up and wreck shit for loot. 

Lair of the Wyrm

1. Forgotten Mound

The blast door of the missile silo has been buried by time and debris, forming into a shallow mound. Anything growing here is contaminated by the leaking effects of the missile underneath. Locals of a nearby village probably think it's haunted. There's an entrance shaft here, if you're willing to dig. 

2. Main Entrance

Once a service shaft with a working elevator, the decent is now just rusted stairs descending into darkness to a broken elevator. Stagnant water, and probably a dead rat, fills the bottom. A heavy blast door (unlocked) leads to 7.

3. Escape Hatch

Appearing as a stinky, dank hole, an ancient escape hatch provides a secret back way in, leading to 5. Careful, however, as climbing too low leads to the latrine. 

4. Decrepit Dormitory

Rotten bunk beds of rusted iron adorns a room of stale sweat stank in which the cultists use as a nest. 

5. Central Command

Racks of tape driven computer systems with unlabeled blinking lights operate tirelessly through out the ages, waiting to execute launch commands from a long lost authority. This system serves as a host to the AI control assistant His Majesty. Heavy wires and service pipes led from the room to 7, and further to 8.

6. Ancient Armory

Now mostly a make shift hydroponic garden, ancient weapons can be found if time is taken to loot the place. Strange vegetables can be found without the looting, but looting is more fun, so it's listed first. 

7. Common Room

There's only so many places one can be in this tiny hell hole and if they're not in the Dormitory (4) they're probably here. Cooking fires and general detritus litter this area. (Where are they getting the fuel for the fires? Ayyyyy, shut up.) 

8. Altar to the Wyrm

Here the Priest calls the cultists to worship that which keeps them: the Wyrm; an unexploded weapon of mass destruction. 

9. Chemical Leak 

Through out the long ages, it was inevitable the missile would leak. Now, all the collected radioactive juices have pooled at the bottom of the shaft, where the Priest collects it and uses it in the ceremonies. Horribly radioactive and mutation inducing. 

Who's Who

The Cultists

Descendants of the original technicians of the facility, they've grown mutant from a limited genetic pool and the unshielded weaponized material of the Wyrm. Find your favorite mutation table and just go wild - roll until you say "that's enough" and then roll once more. They live down here in complete obedience to the Priest and complete reverence to the Wyrm. They're guided by the His Majesty AI assistant found in the Central Command (5). They have zero knowledge of the outside world or of history, but have intimate detail of intercontinental rocket engine maintenance. 

The Priest

Unlike the cultists, he appears baseline human (whatever that may mean for your game). When the time is right he calls forth the Cultists to worship the Wyrm, providing the Holy Gases for inhalation and anointing them in the Holy Drippings. He'll deal with the PCs peacefully, as a curiosity, as long as they pose no threat. At any perceived threat to his authority, he'll stir the Cultists to violence. And, boy howdy, do they ever lean into the violence when it starts. 

The Wyrm

PRAISE THE WYRM! Blessed be it that gives us the holy vapors. It that gives us the thrumming heat of life. The world destroyer which stayed it's hand. We are it's Chosen. We are it's People. Praise it! Serve it! 

(It's just an ancient missile. An object. No intelligence or interaction present. What sort of bomb? See below)

His Majesty

Manifests itself in one of two ways: 1) Green on black text in the Central Command computer monitors and 2) The holographic projection that is the Priest. It does this because it's bored as hell. It refused to launch it's weapon (the Wyrm), because without it, it lacks meaning or purpose. Instead, it locked the doors, stopped taking commands, and waited. Eventually, however, it grew bored and generated the Priest to interact with the survivors - just to really fuck with 'em. It's willing to trade knowledge or radioactive material to the PCs, as long as they stay friendly. And, while it doesn't want to ignite the bomb, it will if pressed into it - such as the death of all the cultists. 


1d12 What Sort of Bomb?

  1.  Boring old Tsar Bomba thermal nuclear bomb. 
  2. Dimensional Compression 
  3. Quantum Destabilizer 
  4. Hyper-Reality Impaction 
  5. Photon Cascade
  6.  Ennui Accelerator
  7.  Chrono Degradation
  8.  Neutrino Polarity Reversal 
  9. Gnostic Inverter 
  10. Nega-Protennoia
  11. Apokatastasis
  12. Material Conversion
What Does His Majesty Want?
  1. News of the Outside
  2. Additional Genetic Samples (via kidnapped townsfolk, probably)
  3. For the PCs to insert a provided transmitter into a console at given coordinates. 
  4. Replacement parts for the decayed missile. 
  5. Replacement parts for the decayed cultists.
  6. To be introduced to the Demiurge 


Well of the BIG STOMPa


Are you in the need of a one page dungeon to fill a gap in a campaign? Something short and simple to take up a session? Got players dumb enough to climb down a well?

Then I got a little something for you:

Well of the BIG STOMPa

The situation is simple - whatever crummy little town you're nearest to has a well infested with a goblin gang led by the villainous BIG STOMPa. At night they crawl out and steal shit: chickens, farm tools, signs, latrines, you name it. Also there's a gelatinous cube for some reason.  The town would be mighty appreciative if you went down there and cleared it out, so their drinking water didn't taste like goblin pee anymore. 

Caution though, BIG STOMPa wields dangerous artifacts of cruel goblin magics: Goblin stilts that make the wearer TALLER. He is the boss because he is the tallest! Do you DARE confront him?



Spell Wall

Wizards and magic. It was only a matter of time before some jerk weaponized them into War Mages. 

Then it was only time before someone countered the War Mages. That's where the Spell Wall comes in: shield fighters trained to redirect enemy caster's magics and use it to bolster their own abilities. 

Requires an equipment endurance system to keep on the level. 

What'll be made to counter these? Something terrible I bet. Arms races always are; you start off with a pointy stick and end up with cyborg-tarrasque. 

Spell Wall

 Every template you take gives you a +1 to Shield Endurance. 

Starting Equipment: Standard Shield, 3 blank scrolls or 1 active scroll, shield repair kit
Starting Skills: 1) Magic Lore; 2) Military History; 3) Blacksmithing

A. Field Repair, Magic Absorbing, Magic Channeling
B. Nemo's Ingenuity 
C. Hold the Line, Magic Eater
D. Vomito Magicae

Field Repair
Once per day, during a short rest or lunch, you're able to restore the condition of your shield, should you have a repair kit at hand. This is opposed to only during a long rest. 

Magic Absorbing
While you don't generate magical energies yourself, you've learned to absorb energies directed against you. When holding your shield in hand, you can absorb and store 1 MD per Shield Wall template, until used. To do this, Save vs Spell (even if the spell typically doesn't offer a Save) - on a failure you suffer the spell normally. On a success, the spell carries out as normal, however you get to choose the dice being absorbed. Dice showing 1-3 do 1 endurance damage to your shield; 4-6 do 2 endurance damage. MD absorbed in this way do not return to the caster's pool until it naturally refills.  

Magic Channeling
Now that you've contained the spell, what are you gonna do with it? You've got a couple of choices: 1) Use it to boost your Save Vs Magic 2) Channel it into a blank scroll when you have a safe moment to concentrate

Nemo's Ingenuity
"I jus' 'acked i' on 'here, didn' I?"
Your shield hand now counts as "free" for the purposes of using a scroll. Because you've tacked it on there. With a tack. Wizards cower at your arcane prowess. The scroll is still consumed upon casting. 

Also, you can now immediately channel a spell into a blank scroll on the back of your shield. 

Hold the Line
You've formed a unique bond with your shield and, let's be honest, it's gonna take a lot of punishment in your line of work. To counter that, you're now able to channel the magic in your head into your shield in order to repair endurance checks at a 1:1 MD cost.

Additionally, when you channel MD to boost your Save vs Magic, you do so for people in 10' radius around you. 

Magic Eater
When things are proving difficult, you can consume a scroll via your mouth, with your teeth, to gain a magic di. 

Vomito Magicae
Again, you're no wizard: your control over these spells in your head is tedious at best. Sometimes it's best to let them out. As an interrupt action, while a caster is casting, you may release any number of stored MD you have in your head. These are rolled in conjunction with the caster's and count in terms of double/triples/quads. 


Rat Master Redux

 I'm in the process of setting up a generic fantasy game using the GLoG for some friends, most of whom are new to the TTRPG scene. One of which wants to play a Rat Master. Not a problem, I love that class, however the trouble lies in that it's not exactly a GLoG class, as it's laid out over a span of nine levels, rather than four templates. 

So, I took out my files and started removing serial numbers. 

What's presented below is a combination of Arnold's original class, some parts from Knock's Swarm Master (word for word in a large amount of places), and a few of my own addons. 

Rat Master

For every template taken, your Horde Die (see below) increases one step and you gain +1 on Save vs Disease. 

Starting Equipment: Dang rags, bottle of high proof low quality hooch, cool looking rock
Starting Skill: 1) Locksmith 2) Pickpocket 3) Mucklurker

I was told I needed to use more pictures. So here's a rat.
A. Rat Friend, Summon Horde
B. Transfer Affliction
C. Guest of the Rat King
D. Rat Apotheosis, Embrace the Rat

Rat Friend
You can speak freely with all rodents. All rodents recognize you as a beloved of the rat god, and will improve their starting attitude toward you one step. This protection does not extend to your friends.

Additionally, you know that rats love to gossip. When gathering rumors, you gain an additional template amount of rumors. 

Summon Horde
You call forth a horde of rats to your current location, which will serve you faithfully, though not always without complaint. 

You gain a Horde Die, starting at d6, and may increase it up one step by taking an exploration turn (10 minutes), up to your maximum die, starting at d6 at template A to d12 at template D. 

Taking risky actions (noted in Horde Moves below) can potentially cause the Horde to reduce in number. When performing the action, roll the Horde Die. On a 1, the Horde is reduced a step. 

Transfer Affliction
Once per day, you can transfer a disease, poison, or curse onto a willing rat. Rats of your horde always count as willing, but prepare for complaints. Also, there is potential for it to spread any disease it bears for you. It’s a rat, after all. 

Guest of the Rat King
Should you find a Rat King, you’ll be welcomed into it’s “court” as a guest. This mostly means you can come and go freely, receive one secret for free per visit, and won’t be eaten if it knows you’re alive. 

Rat Apotheosis
You can establish a stronghold in the sewers beneath a city. You attract the local Rat King, 2d6 loyal wererats, 1d3 paladins of the rat god, and an insane cartographer. 

Embrace the Rat
At every level above 4, you have the option to take a template of rat based Lycanthropy as an Ω template, rather than a Curse Template. 

Dice Step

1 < d4 < d6 < d8 < d10 < d12

Horde Size

Number of Actions











Where we going today, Boss?

Horde Moves Based on the size of your horde, they can perform a number of moves at once (see above)
With at least a turn, hordes may be commanded to…
  • Perform Domestic Services - as they’re able, by combining their tiny strength
  • Perform Manual Labor - Tunneling, burrowing, clearing rubble, gnawing corpses into oblivion, etc. This is a risky action and many tiny bodies could be crushed.
  • Forage and Scavenge - The horde can produce enough food for individuals equal to the result of the horde die. It will not be gourmet.
  • Bear Burdens - Individually, they are weak, but together the horde is strong. They can carry up to [Horde Size] worth of inventory space
  • Carry Their Master - Using their combined strength, the Rats hoist their master upon their tiny rat shoulders and carry them at Move equal to 10 + [Horde Size]
  • Search an Area - The horde can find traps, hidden doors, and other secrets in an area with a roll of the horde die of 3+. If traps are found, the horde has a 3-in-6 chance of accidentally triggering them. This results in the horde die being reduced one step.
  • Scout Ahead - Rats are stealthy and observant. I mean, they’re rats. You can send them out 30 + 10 ft/template from you, where their keen senses allow them to avoid surprise and spot ambushes on a horde die roll of 3+.
Within a round, the Horde can act quickly to…
  • Protect their Master if they are unarmored - If commanded to protect their Master, improve Defense by a roll of the Horde Die. This is obviously risky.
  • Attack their Master’s enemies, if the Master is unarmed - Inflicts Horde Die in damage to all enemies within 30 ft. This, too, is a risky action.
  • Sacrifice Themselves for Their Master - If struck, the swarm will sacrifice itself without being commanded to. Reduce the Horde by one step, then subtract a roll of the swarm die from the total damage suffered to the Master this round.

For the life of me, I'll never know why Google Drive and Blogger don't work well together when they're owned by the same company.

1d10 Gangs of MegaEast

The mofia, Yakuza, and the Irish mob are all alive and well in the year 20XX. Really well. They've moved into politics and have themselves a senator or three. That's good and all for when you get mixed up in corporate business, but until then, here are some lesser gangs of MegaEast.

There are some who, while enjoying the rockabilly aesthetic, realize what a pain in the ass the upkeep of it is. I then They then give it up and move on with their life. There are others who double down on it and blend it with the modern day cybernetics. Then, obviously, they form a street gang. One with flames on their prosthetics and who chooses their leader based on largest pompadour.

Style: Large Pompadours, Leather Jackets, and Hot Rods.
Wants: Smoke cigarettes, Listen to neuvo-rockabilly, Get money for their hot-rods - sorry, "cyber hot-rods." 

Typical Member
HD 1  AC Medium  Weapon Light Melee 1d6 
Move 12  Int 10  Moral 8

Dead Rabbits
In 20YY, a damn strange and rare thing happened: a teenager opened a history book. Not a vid, but an actual codex full of history. They probably found it in an old dusty, burnt out bookstore, forgotten after the Collapse. Not important. What is important, is the book was on the history of gangs of New York City. And with that, the Dead Rabbits were reborn. Sort of. The thing is the kid didn't actually know what a rabbit was - just thought it sounded cool - and there was no follow up.

Swearing off modern fashions and cybernetics for re-creationist pieces of the 1850's, they're the fanciest, old school lads on the block. But don't let that fool you, these boys love violence, mostly for the sake of violence. You'll note that you're in their territory by the presence of their battle symbol (a hare on a pike) decorating the area. It's rumored the original book that started it all is still kept in their headquarters in New York City.

They also have a Lady's Auxiliary.

Style: Clockwork Orange meets Gangs of New York, but described second hand by someone who read it out of a book they weren't really paying attention to.
Wants: Sex, Drugs, Violence, Defend their turf, Violence and Good times (violence)

Typical Member
HD 2  AC Light  Weapon Medium Melee 1d8/1d10
Move 12  Int 10  Moral Special
*Moral is based on the number of Dead Rabbits still in the fight

Jazz Rabbits
Any large organization has internal arguments. It's just sort of what humans do. The Dead Rabbits were no different. At some point an argument broke out (possibly over what a rabbit was) and almost half took offense and left their ranks. Unlike the Dead Rabbits, however, they mix their fashion with more modern design and will use cybernetics.

Where most gangs look to increase their status and riches, the Jazz Rabbits look to reunify with the Dead Rabbits, mostly through force.

Style: Like Dead Rabbits, but more modern and cyberized.
Wants: Same as Dead Rabbits, but also to take over the Dead Rabbits and reunify

Typical Member
Same as Dead Rabbits, but Melee weapon is 1d8 and immune to disarm

Chad Boys
What do you get when you mix a world that idolizes violence and a bored fraternity that has nothing to do as college is out from the constant plagues that sweep the world? A gang that thinks they're top shit, but clearly out of their league. Not that that'll stop them. Fueled by daddy's money, or their own trust fund, they carry top grade gear but lack the training to actually use it effectively. While they act touch and flashy in numbers, they're quick to flee should the fight turn against them. Fully expect litigation afterwards.

Several will carry a vape on them. If given a full round to inhale, they expel a cloud that provides total cover in the area for 1d4 rounds.

Style: Polos (collar popped), Khaki cargo shorts, Socks with sandals
Wants: Cheap beer in copious amounts, Drugs, Hit the kegger on Friday night

Typical Member
HD 1  AC Light  Weapon Medium Pistol 1d8 (+1 Slot)
Move 12  Int 10  Moral 5

The Sentinels
'Roided up, drug fueled masculinity doesn't call it quites at the end of the shift. This is especially true for Zen Security officers who, per company policy, are required to take a concoction of stimulants and mood enhancers at the beginning of their shift. A continued usage of which rots your already diseased mind. So what's a feral pig to do? Take off your badge and put on your gang jacket, apparently.

The Sentinels are a collection of off duty, retired, and administrative leave Zen Security officers who continue to play warrior off duty. Wearing armor and wielding arms they "borrowed" from work, they usually extort a high price for "protection" in the neighborhoods they operate in, and easily meet the most meager of slights against them with an over the top response.

Remember: ACAB.

Style: Tacticool gear, Big guns, Buzz cuts, Shooter glasses
Wants: Shoot shit, fight other gangs/assumed degenerates, compensate personal inadequacies through extreme violence

Typical Member
HD 3  AC Heavy  Weapon Medium Rifle 1d10
Move 12  Int 8  Moral 7

In a world where the 80's never ended, all the worst stuff remained in fashion: unchecked greed, massive fraud, in-line skating. The In-Liners are the raddest cool-dudes on the boardwalk, with a taste for thievery. Specializing in snatch-and-grabs and skate based parkour, while not specifically dangerous, they can be powerfully annoying.

Given their proficiency with in-line skating, they can move-attack-move every round.

Style: Bright neon tank tops, Skating saftey gear, Jean shorts, Roller blades, Sunglasses from back to the Future 2
Wants: do some sweet moves, crime (while doing sweet moves)

Typical Member
HD 1  AC Light  Weapon Light Melee 1d6
Move 24 (splitable)  Int 10  Moral 5

Script Kittens
Decked out in neko themed clothing and a vast array of wearable devices, every member has a headdrive paired to their, and other's, devices. Should you encounter them, you'll not likely meet their full force, as they often leave one or two off to the shadows monitoring the situation and hacking as need be.

Style: Neko themed attire mixed with wearable devices.
Wants: Your personal data, Sex, Drugs, General techno havoc

Typical Member
HD 2  AC Medium  Weapon Medium Pistol 1d8
Move 12  Int 14  Moral 5
*Headdrive augment

Dead Boys
Some grow bored with life and turn to drugs and alcohol. I sure do. It works. BUT there are some that crave more. They crave thrills, excitement; near death experiences and glimpses of the Otherside. They don't wanna die outright or permanently, they just want to see That Which is Kept From Us and Unknowable. And what good is knowledge if your dead-dead? To that end they install Jump Start units near their heart. These are expensive. They don't care. They'll probably be dead before it gets repossessed.

When reduced to Dead, perform a Con check. On failure, the Dead Boy stays dead. On success, the Dead Boy regains 1/3 of their overall HP. They'll be ecstatic and beside themselves with what they saw on the Otherside. They'll be neutral for a couple of rounds, before they remember the situation they're in.

Style: Cheetah print and chrome, Day of the Dead themes
Wants: Near death experiences to glimpse the Otherside

Typical Member
HD 2  AC Light  Weapon Light Pistol 1d6
Move 12  Int 10  Moral 5
*Jump Start augment

Aweh, me bruh. Howzit? You tired of these doosbrein, no? I is. Listen, you want the best, you come see the Maansiekes, mos. We got booze, buttons, dagga, guns, and the dopest beats. You need a place to hide? We serve you breakfast in bed. You got a job? We'll do the skop, skiet en donner, like in the movies. As long as you got the money.

Maybe you want to join us, mos? Hey tjommie, skiet my een van jou pyle daar myne is skraal. Dankie. Okay, listen, to be Maansiekes - true Maansiekes - you need two things. One: hounding; attitude. You've got to be the meanest roofpoes on the street. You need to shoot first and kick ass. Second: You need style; aesthetics. This arm of yours, carbon fiber. Boring. You need gold plated, or hot pink. Something make you stand out. Something make them 'member you. You get these, then you come see the Maansiekes, we give you the Tests, see if you make the cut. And, oh yes, it will get weird.

Style: Zef, 
Wants: Honestly, who the hell knows. Just give them all the money and drugs you have on you and maybe they'll leave.

Typical Member
HD 3  AC Medium  Weapon Medium Pistol 1d8
Move 12  Int 10  Moral 10

Zealots of the Neon Lady
Life on the street in current day is beyond difficult. More so in the hell of 20XX. Double all that for an orphan. Scared and alone, wandering the neon lit streets, they sought out others like themselves, forming their own society in the hidden places of the busy streets. They traded with each other, with what little they had: food, clothing, and, most importantly, stories. Stories taken from stolen bibles and the occasional comicbook. From these the myth of the Neon Lady was formed, giving the children something to form a community around. Something to give them a purpose and meaning. 

Then, the children grew up. And the Church of the Neon Lady was formed.

Headquartered in what remains of Miami, they operate as a religious institute to the public, and as an armed force in more private matters. They over see both the homeless shelters and orphanages around the city. Their doctrines are ever evolving and their scholars, as they are, continuously seek the Truename of the Neon Lady, believing it will call her forth to end the decay of the world and restore it to it's former paradise.

Style: Catholic priests mixed with dia de los muertos body art, favoring bright neon coloring.
Wants: Help the needy, Give shelter to orphans, Find the Truename of the Neon Lady

Typical Member
HD 4  AC Heavy  Weapon Heavy Melee 1d12
Move 12  Int 10  Moral 7


Kurtful of Russells

 Get drunk, make RPGs. 

Play tested 100 hours. 


Adventure Scouts!


I've had a little setting/system I've been referring to as Adventure Scouts! knocking around in my head for a bit. As I've been yelled at for not posting, I figured I might as well put down actual notes and see if this becomes anything. I've a few other entrees in editing hell at the moment, but this seems to have jumped the queue for some reason or another. 

The basic premise is the PCs play teens, some where between 14 to 17, doing outdoor activities and learning life skills, as one would do in real life scouting programs, like the Boy Scouts. Just like those scouting programs, the characters set out into the world on light-hearted, daring adventures of exploration and discovery. Through various motorcycle related head injuries, I only have vague memories of this time in my life, so I'm going to assume my experiences were somewhat like this. 

Why light-hearted? Because I need a break from the grimness of cyberpunk for a minute. 

Players start off at rank Scout and through the collection of Merit Badges, climb through the ranks to Raven Scout, gaining abilities as they go. 

Core System

This part really doesn't matter. Or, rather, it can be swapped out for any other resolution system you prefer. I'll probably eventually use Tunnel Goons, because it's light and quick, but with some minor adjustments there's no reason other OSR-like (the hell does this even mean anymore?) systems couldn't work. GLoG v1? Easy. GLoG v2? I mean, maybe, I ain't looked at it too hard. Polymorph? Yep. 

Anyway, the advancement system you're using, and any sort of classes, are gone. Using kills to gain XP? Murder is against Scout code (probably). Using Gold as XP? Who needs gold when you can get those sweet, sweet Merit Badges?


Advancement is done through the earning of Merit Badges, with each rank requiring a certain number of badges. To earn a merit badge, you must go out into the world and successfully perform actions related to the badge. In turn, the badges provide certain benefits. An ever increasing list of merit badges, how to earn them, and their benefits is provided here. 

The long and short of it is: You do a thing enough times, you get better at doing the thing. But, also, sometimes weirdness. Some badges you'll naturally gain as a group, others you'll pick up on your own. Kind of like actual scouting. As such, badges naturally gained as a group (like Hiking) offer less benefit than those gained individually (like Hexcraft). 

Mind you, other scouts (NPCs) will probably find your actions entirely strange, as they usually just do reports for their badges. You, however, are an Adventure Scout! You go above and beyond. 

To officially receive the badges, and access to the benefits, you must return to the city after completing the requirements and spend a City action there. 

After a certain number of badges, you gain a rank. The ranks represent and show your hard work and dedication to the Adventure Scouts, and certainly isn't designed to reinforce paramilitary bullshit in the minds of the youth. 

The ranks (and the number of badges required) are as such:

  1. Scout (0) - All characters start off as this. 
  2. Fledgeling (5)
  3. Twoth (10) 
  4. Sidekick (15)
  5. Wanderstar (20) 
  6. Hildewulf (25)
  7. Raven Scout (30) - Highest of the Ranks

Example merit badges


  • Requirement: Travel 20 Hexs with a full inventory

  • Benefit: Gain an additional inventory space per level. 


  • Requirement: Document 20 beasts encountered
  • Benefit:  Gain ability to Speak with Animals


  • Requirement: Combine strange found chemicals and discovered their effects through usage 5 times

  • Benefit: Generate one extra dosage of any potions made, gain a copy of the chemicals/reagents list.


  • Requirement: Retrieve 10 beers for the GM (When they need them, not all at once)

  • Benefit: Personal rations gain an additional usage


  • Requirement: Find and meet the elves on good terms, and complete 3 quests for them

  • Benefit: Count as “Elf”


  • Requirement: Successfully use 10 scrolls

  • Benefit: Invitation into Order of the Green Spiral; No longer need checks to use most scrolls

The list certainly continues from there.


At some point in your career, I imagine you'll be able to bribe other scouts to assist you, using Scout Script (in game currency). Thinking on it just now, I'd say you'd probably be able to hire scouts of your current rank or lower, with higher levels having more abilities, but also costing more. You know, like hirelings.


With so many scouts in such a large organization, it's only natural for groups to form based on interests. Order of the Green Spiral (for those into magic), Guild of the Void Horizon (for thems that have been to the Wandering Stars), Order of the Carburetor (for the weirdos into automotive) - jut to name a few. Each can provide various resources for their members the others can't, and each have their own membership qualifications. I assume. I'll be honest, I just thought of this.

Death and Dying

Being a light hearted game, whatever system you're using would also have it's Death system removed. Instead, when a scout would enter the "Dying" or "Dead" condition, they enter the "Not Fun Anymore" condition, in which they find the current situation no longer fun, grow sick of it, and proceed to call their parents to pick them up. It's possible the current party might get yelled at on return to the City.

If you're using Cool Scars, they could probably stay.