1d30 for Izzy

Good grief, the new blogger interface is trifling and powerfully ugly. Looks like publication scheduling ain't working well either? 

Anyway, a stretch of writer's block hit and to get through it I gave a general call for random tables. Turns out my buddy Izzy needed some random encounters. I think he's using Pathfinder, but I ain't certain, nor did I take any measures to find out. 

1d30 Random Encounters for Izzy

1. A bear, porcupine, and a raccoon sit around a campfire. A barrel of booze is near by. They are not magical, can not talk nor have the means to make a fire. They will defend the booze.
2. A mostly naked wizard is in full swing of a mushroom trip. It may not be going well. Whenever they speak mutated spells ooze out of their head applying themselves upon the world. If killed in this state, a spellscar will be left on reality here.
3. The PCs come across a looter stripping corpses of their gear. If examined, the corpses are of the PCs, though the looter will not acknowledge this. 
4. A bricked pit full of blood, encircled by mark-less corpses. Neither wind nor animals stir in this location. Should the PCs leave and come back, the pit will be gone. Possible to be encountered elsewhere.
5. An ordinary chest full of gems. Nothing out of the ordinary here. Certainly not a pregnant mimic full of eggs. Nope. 
6. A water elemental is stuck in an almost dry stream bed. It's sad, lonely, and can't find it's way back to the ocean. 
7. A forest witch has passed out in her stream hovel, deep in her drunken sleep. A mysterious potion bubbles in a cauldron and several bottles chill in the stream. Her skeleton fox familiar guards them from inside the stream. 
8. A beautiful figure bathes in a stream waterfall. They wave the PCs over to join them. Should the PCs decide to get close, they'll soon learn what lingual luring is as the colossal alligator snapping turtle currently hiding behind the waterfall tries to eat them. 
9. Orc bootleggers speed down the trail on strange Gerry rigged iron wagons belching black smoke, fueled by the very shine they sell. They'll sell ya some (meth too) if you prove y'aint constables. If they smell law on ya though, they'll start slinging bombs.
10. A meteor has crashed to earth. From out of the smoking crater, biomechanicals have emerged and begun to harvest the surrounding area,  and spreading their biomechanical infection to the wildlife. 
11. 8 floating psionic octopi carrying alien instruments of brutality. A vanguard for a larger army! The war for the surface has begun!
12. Worker fairies from a nearby hive are unionizing. They'll need a third-partyto deliver their demands to the Queen.
13. A large golem (goes by Hank) waits patiently in the woods, adorned in a multitude of runes of explosion. He insists on calling the PCs his "owners" (finders keepers) and further insists that the PCs order him to explode. Turns out Hank is a mine golem from some long and forgotten magic war, and his only purpose for existing is to explode. He wants to do it soooooo bad. Won't you help him? (Destroys entire hex if exploded. No saves.)
14. A young lady is weeping over a pig. Her brother/sister has been transformed into swine, and only a stranger's kiss can revert them back. Unfortunately, the young lady is just a liar and a pervert.
15. A young lady is weeping over a pig. Her brother/sister has been transformed into swine, and only a stranger's kiss can revert them back. Unfortunately, it's a transitive curse, and will change the kisser into a pig while freeing the original victim.
16. Bear beer wizard. Will trade mead for wizard teeth.
17. Necro-jellies have got in the go'dang Potter's field again! Stop 'em be-fer they get to gran'pappy's still!
18. What if Gorcrows, but with Hobbits?
19. You meet an average enough looking fella. He doesn't blink and is too wet. He's accompanied by a boiling kettle, but no heat source. He'll offer the PCs a longer life and better healing, in exchange for something. Should the PCs accept, well then, welcome your new body mate! You now have a fun, new parasite taking care of your body to feast on your spirit. It's possibly an aboleth. +1 healing per round. Roll new mental states and take the averageof the two sets as your conscience melds. 
20. Did you know there's an elemental plane of spiders? You do now, thanks to a drunk summoner ripping a hole in reality. Enjoy.
21. Symbiote Jellies are overwhelming and bounding to a Forest Giant. 
22. "Lycanthropy" is a template you can apply. Apply it to a centaur tribe and enjoy the half-man, half-horse, half-wolf experience. Wait...it'd be full man, wouldn't it?
23. A will o' wisp and a leucrocuta begin vying for the PCs attention, leading them in different directions. Turns out the creatures have a little bet going, and both will lead the PCs to certain danger. 
24. What if Hydras, but with Hobbits?
25. A Lantern Archon has fallen in love with a normal lantern. It wants the PCs to set it up on a date, and insists they help it go off without a hitch. I ain't never seen a lovelorn Archon, but I'm guessing it ain't pretty. 
26. A small camp of Orcs are fermenting and distilling Gray Ooze. It smells horrible, but get's ya drunk!
27. What if a Rat King, but with Hobbits?
28. A ghost inside of a skeleton inside of a zombie inside of a iron golem (looks like plate armor) 
29. A group of Cyclopes are playing a version of lawn darts. There have been and will be casualties. 
30. Cosmic radioactive moon apes.