Shivering Eddy and his Sick Dog

(Based on real events)

Shivering Eddy gets his name from his huge drug problem, one that'll kill him in a low number of years. He's an unremarkable fellow, about 5'7", dirty clothes and a dirtier smile. A known boozer and smutmonger, the lights went out of his eyes years ago. He can be found, usually, in an alley way down by the docks trying to acquire scratch for his next fix.

But we're not here to talk about Eddy's troubles or the event that ended his successful mayorship and drove him to this life.

We're here to talk about his dog: Barphie

You see, Barphie is Eddy's only friend. A medium sized, feral looking mutt with wild eyes and a patchy coat, he's got a habit of eating just about anything, while lacking the ability to digest most of it. Eddy, being Eddy, has found a way of profiting off his dog's condition. He jokingly calls it pukeomancy, buts it's actually sortilege by way of canomancy. Not that he knows this. Or cares. For a modest fee, or a serving of beer, he'll read old Barphie's productions and give you a fortune. And people do pay him, mostly out of morbid curiosity, sometimes out of concern for the dog.

Surprise to no one, Eddy is full of shit.

Barphie, however, has never been wrong.

It may be a while since I've seen a dog. Or a horse hoof.

What ya got today, Barphie?
  1. An old ring, still worn on a finger - Fortune. Within the next 24 hours a minor sum of money (1d10 standard currency) will be found.
  2. Rat - Good Health. Any alcoholic drink consumed within the next 12 hours will restore one HP.
  3. A Two and a Half Foot Length of Chain - Imprisonment. You'll be wrongly accused of a crime within the next 24 hours.
  4. Horse Hoof - Luck. If the shoe is still on it (2-in-6 chance) you'll have good luck and will be able to adjust one single roll by 2 point. (Use by end of session) Else wise, you've back luck, and the GM is required to adjust a roll by 2 point against you.
  5. A Living, Unharmed, but Very Confused Bat - Love. The next reaction roll in response to you will be improved by one.
  6. Snake Skins. Yes, Plural - Paranoia. Your greatest enemy knows exactly where you are.
  7. An Old Book - Forgotten Knowledge. A secret will come to you within 24 hours. OR whenever the GM gets time.
  8. Key Ring - Insecurity. One of these keys will open the next lock you encounter. Not sure which one, but there sure are a lot of them. Takes twice as long as lock picking to try them all.
  9. A Child's Doll - Children. You will be kidnapped by an orphan gang next time you sleep.
  10. Teeth. A Lot of Them. They're Not His - Troubled Times Ahead. Chance of random encounters are increased by one tier for the next 12 hours.
  11. Clam Shells - Mysterious bounty. Give the next panhandler 100 money units, and they'll give you a most peculiar item in return. Maybe it's useful. Maybe it can be further traded.
  12. Prosthetic Leg - Hobbled. Your movement speed is reduced by half for the next 24 hours.
  13. Moths, Still Fluttering - Deception. Someone you're working with isn't who they say they are, and are likely to betray you.
  14. A Bag of Drugs - Breath. Saves against Gas attacks are made at a +2 bonus for 24 hours.
  15. Kepi - Vigilance. The next time the PC tries to do something shady, an officer of the law will appear to catch them in the act and question their actions.
  16. Flashlight or Torch Head (Still Smoldering) - Light. For the next 12 hours lights are twice as resilient against guttering checks.
  17. An Uncomfortable Amount of Seaweed - Grim Revelation. Your greatest secret will become known, and possibly soon, should you not take steps to further hide it.
  18. An Upper Class Lady's Carry, Hand Still Clutching - Sturdy. All equipment on your person has a temporary additional condition box for 24 hours.
  19. Fake Eye - Stealth. Your next attempt at an Ambush will be successful, if within 12 hours.
  20. A Still Lit and Very Active Explosive - Panic. You're next few rounds (1d4) are going to be violently busy.


1 comment:

  1. This would work so well for the Esoteric Enterprises game. Prophetic dog puke for the win!